Got A DNP (Coaches Decision) From God

I have a little note in my desk drawer that says, “Babe Ruth struck out 1,330 times.” It’s a reminder to me that striking out is not a disqualification for coming back to the plate.

When the apostle James was writing about teaching, he said, “We all stumble in many ways.” If everyone who made a mistake while teaching someone else was disqualified from further teaching, there wouldn’t be anyone doing it. In fact, most of us learn best from teachers who admit their mistakes. We can’t identify with teachers who act like they always get everything right and are far superior to their students. We want to learn from people who are like us – teachers who walk where we walk and stumble where we stumble. A wise teacher explains, “This is the way you stumble and this is the way God helps you to go on.”

No wise teacher ever said that. Teachers aren't supposed invoke god into school. Duh.

What if you never get to really play in God's little game of life? You know, like what if God makes you born with a crippling disease and you don't get a chance to get baptised and die before you even have a chance to make a mistake? God makes you stumble and then trips you to the ground and stomps you to death?

Why doesn't God give everyone a fair shake to learn all these great lessons with his infinite love?

Life Is Infinitely Valuable... If You Make The Cut

There’s much debate in America about the value of life. Issues such as capital punishment, abortion and euthanasia arouse great emotion. As the world’s population grows, many consider life to be not very valuable at all.

But that’s completely contrary to the way Jesus viewed people. Jesus considered every individual to be valuable. Whenever Jesus looked at another person, he saw the likeness of God in them.

When you’re old enough to have friends with grown children, it can be rather startling to meet those children and see the strong resemblance to their parents. It’s like you already know them. That’s what it’s like to see the likeness of God in other people. We’re to value every human being as a special creation in the image of God and to consider each person as someone of infinite worth.

I'm not so sure, how valuable can life really be to someone who can just rise from the dead whenever they feel like it anyway?

It's pretty obvious god's a huge fan of the practice of capital punishment if you read his book. And with his obsession with miscarriages, God aborts more in-womb beating hearts than every doctor ever.

I'm sure there's some twisted counter-argument, but on pure logical thought, the very belief of Christianity significantly devalues human earthly life. Since we either spend eternity in either heaven or hell... life is simply an infinitesimal blip as a means to arrive at one of those 2 places.

So under this cult of belief, you're of infinite worth to god in the sense that you spend eternity with him (assuming you pass his earth test). But beyond the test part, your human life is pretty much worth jack shit. And Jack just left town.

Dream About A Zombie Fable In Order To Get Courage To Set New Goals For Yourself

Dreams are an important part of the human experience. Dreams give us hope. Dreams help us to anticipate the way we want things to become. It is our way of visualizing ourselves in a preferred tomorrow.

But sometimes our dreams are unfulfilled and we wonder why. Do you have an unfulfilled dream? In the past did you dream that you would lose weight, get married, buy a house, be promoted or make the team?

If you see your life as one of unfulfilled dreams, then this message is for you. There is a positive antidote to unfulfilled dreams. Instead of continual disappointment because life didn’t turn out the way you dreamed, turn your heart and hope to Jesus. He will give you the strength to get beyond yesterday’s disappointment and the courage to dream again.

Unfulfilled dreams? Turn your heart and hope to Jesus? And you thought you were disappointed before...

Might i suggest a new strategy instead of living your life like you're playing the lotto?

Stop dreaming. Stop imagining there's some magic presence that will someday start dealing you aces in the card game of life.

Start taking personal action. Start a meal plan if you want to lose weight. Join a social group to meet more people and find a spouse if you want to get married. Stay late after work if you want a promotion.

Or go make out with Jesus and give him a promise ring, probably just as effective.

Aphrodite Never Changes

Heraclitus was a Greek philosopher who taught that change is the essence of the universe. When we look around, we see change everywhere. Just as the flames of a fire are always changing, so our lives are in a constant state of flux.

So how does God fit into all of this? Is he caught by surprise? Is he merely dragged along by the forceful currents of change in our world? The Bible makes it quite clear that, unlike the world, God does not change. He knows everything in advance and he’s in complete control.

The recognition that God is in control calls us to take responsibility for things we can control and to trust him for what we cannot control. Whether the changes in our lives bring extraordinary happiness or unspeakable pain, God is in ultimate control and he is trustworthy.

Wait... did i just pass out? Or did he just use an ancient Greek philosopher to explain that "god never changes?" Huh? You might recognize ancient Greece from such things as Zeus, Hera, Ares, Apollo, Hades, Athena and many more.

For some reason i'm thinking that god going from being a whole bus load of different people for different elements — to just being one dude or presence — qualifies as a "change." But maybe that's just me.

Also i can't control that oil spill in the Gulf and totally trusted god would have it cleaned up by now. God better hurry up with the mop and bucket or i might have to ground him this weekend. If i can't trust him, he loses the priviledge of going out of the house.

Religious People Are Easily Persuaded

Most of us don’t want to be characterized as “submissive,” yet the Bible describes the person living according to God’s wisdom as being submissive. The word “submissive” literally means “open to reason or easily persuaded.” You may think that sounds like being a wimp – the kind of person who’s gullible and easily pressured and persuaded – but that’s really not what it’s saying. The submissive person truly listens to others’ points of view and has the inclination to agree rather than disagree.

Too often we automatically say “no” before listening to someone’s request. A submissive person doesn’t always go along with anything that’s suggested, but that person’s initial default is to try to say “yes.” Hearing the other person out and trying to go along whenever possible, is the way of God’s wisdom.

That's really strange because every time i have a discussion with a person of god's wisdom, "hearing me out" is about the last thing they want to do. I mean obviously it's because they have an absolute abhorrence for logic and evidence. But isn't it obvious that if religious people were open to being persuaded, there wouldn't be any left?

God's A Rental Car Company

Fender benders are one of life’s annoyances. Not the least of the frustrations is how to get around while your car is being repaired. I remember a time when it happened to me and a friend graciously offered me the use of his car while he was on vacation. I gratefully accepted, not minding that his car happened to be a brand new Porsche! It was a great car and I loved driving it. But, you know, I treated that Porsche differently because it wasn’t mine. I drove more carefully. I think I even enjoyed it more because I knew I would have to give it back.

And that’s how we should treat all of our possessions. We should believe that everything we have belongs to God. It may be ours to use for awhile, but whenever he wants it back, it’s his to claim. It’s an attitude that helps keep our wealth (or lack of it) in perspective.

A Porsche! What an evil asshole this guy is! Why the fuck was he spending so much time chasing dollar signs where he could afford a Porsche instead of praising and seeking god?

And why didn't your dumb ass drive more carefully and pretend your car "was god's possession" in the first place? God's gonna be pretty pissed when he gets that car back from you and checks the CARFAX report and finds a Salvage Title. Tread carefully my friend! I've read some things in the bible where god gets pretty mean and petty, and it was over a lot less than wrecking his car he loaned you.

Mo Money, Mo Problems

When a reporter asked billionaire John D. Rockefeller, “How much money is enough?” he answered, “A little bit more.”

Everywhere we go, we get the message that our worth as persons is defined in terms of our wealth. But listen to what Jesus taught, “I tell you the truth, it is hard for a rich man to enter the kingdom of heaven.…It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God.”

We live in a time of great affluence – when it’s all too easy to put our trust in our wealth rather than in God. Our standard of living is amazing compared to that of much of the world. But, wealth itself isn’t the problem; it’s the importance we give it. Trusting in our wealth is a tragic mistake.

After all, wealth is temporary, but heaven is forever!

Now this is some real shit, even for this guy. GREAT fucking message. I just love when religion tells you to marginalize your life and lives of others on earth because "the party doesn't really start until after you die."

So yeah... don't try to make money and provide for your kids, just put your trust in god... he'll feed your kids...By the way, your kids like rainwater and dandelions right? Eat up kids! Yummers!

And what the hell is this shit?:

It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle, than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God.
- Matthew 19:24

Orrrr?

Blessed is the man that feareth the Lord... Wealth and riches shall be in his house...
- Psalms 112:1-3

Thanks for nothing once again bible.